Tuesday, January 23, 2007,
im just losing myself ....
i don even know wads goin to happen anymore ....
sometimes i just don feel like growing anymore ....
i just don have the heart to face the problems thats goin to find us when we grow up ...
how i feel i could just end this straight ..
start everyting all over again ....
maybe i wont be this sad ...
maybe i wont have to endure so much pain ....
maybe i wont even know u ...
maybe ...
thats so much better ...
cos ...
its hard nt to think bout it ...
why should we be forced to endure so much pain ?
why ?
i don want to think bout it anymore ...
i just want to forget ..
no matter how heartbroken i will be ...
cos i have no choice ....
i don want drag this doomed thread anymore ....
its hopeless ...
just like me ...
and i wont want u dragged down with me ...
cos ..
when u are goin up ..
im falling down ....
when u are looking up to the stars ....
im staring at the bottomless pit below fearing for the worst ...
no matter how much i want to be by ur side ....
protecting u ....
its nt possible ...
cos it just wasnt meant to be ...
fate decided our lives even before we have chosen it ....
if i had a choice ...
i would never have wanted to know u ...
knowing wad pain would come before us ..
we would be better off without knowing each other ...
cos u are destined for greatness ...
whereas me ...
im just here to make up the number ...
i have no option left ...
i made a wrong choice ...
took a wrong step ...
and just like chinese chess ...
when u make a crucial wrong step ...
there is no way back ...
i hate myself for this foolish mistake ...
but i cant do anything anymore ...
wad i can do ....
is to watch silently and sadly ...
as u drift further and further away ...
leaving me in the shadows ...
until i just become a had been of ur life ...
a stage u cleared ...
a mere memory ...
i don want it to be like that ....
but im powerless to stop it ....
to stop this society ...
to stop the real problem causing it ...
all i hope is that u will never forget me ...
as i will never forget u ...
my heart will always have a spot reserved for u ...
as u are the most special person i have ever seen so far ...
Tuesday, January 23, 2007
